Blessing Others While Suffering

Dr. Rob Green March 19, 2023 1 Peter 3:8-12
Outline

1 Peter 2:12 - Keep your behavior excellent among the Gentiles, so that in the thing in which they slander you as evildoers, they may because of your good deeds, as they observe them, glorify God in the day of visitation.

3 truths to embrace to bless those who hurt you

I. Remember You are Called to Bless Others

1 Peter 2:21 - For you have been called for this purpose, since Christ also suffered for you, leaving you an example for you to follow in His steps…

1 Peter 3:9 - …but giving a blessing instead; for you were called for the very purpose that you might inherit a blessing.

A. Give a blessing

1 Peter 3:10-12 - For, “The one who desires life, to love and see good days, must keep his tongue from evil and his lips from speaking deceit. He must turn away from evil and do good; he must seek peace and pursue it. For the eyes of the Lord are toward the righteous, and His ears attend to their prayer, but the face of the Lord is against those who do evil.”

B. Speak truthfully

C. Do good

D. Pursue peace

II. Develop the Proper Character

1 Peter 3:8 - …all of you be harmonious, sympathetic, brotherly, kindhearted, and humble in spirit…

A. Harmonious

B. Sympathetic

C. Brotherly love

D. Kindhearted or compassionate

E. Humble in spirit

III. Rejoice in Your Eternal Home and the Lord’s Justice

1 Peter 3:9 - …for you were called for the very purpose that you might inherit a blessing.

A. You inherit a blessing

1 Peter 3:10 - The one who desires life, to love and see good days…

B. The eyes of the Lord pay attention to the righteous and the evil

1 Peter 3:12 - For the eyes of the Lord are toward the righteous, and His ears attend to their prayer, but the face of the Lord is against those who do evil.

Our annual theme is Hope for Everyday Life. Believers should have a positive outlook on the future because we believe God will always do that which results in his glory and our good.

However, we have not implied “love Jesus and you will not have any problems,” or “follow Christ and he will give you whatever you want.” The Bible is clear that life can be hard.

  • Living as a committed Christian places us at odds with some.
  • Living for Jesus sometimes means suffering at the hands of those who do not love Jesus as much as we do.

Amid suffering we were called to good deeds, to submit to government authorities even when they get things wrong, to bosses who are unreasonable, and to husbands who are disobedient to the Word.

These words sit heavy upon us. Husbands must live with their wives according to knowledge and show her honor even if she is a pill.

  • To make matters worse, the husband who refuses to do so losses the attention of God.

Maybe we need to rename the series …Depression for everyday life. But it is right at this moment that we see the example of Jesus.

  • He left us an example (2:21)
  • He kept entrusting himself to the Father (2:23) knowing that God enacts justice perfectly (2:23)
  • So that he could accomplish the Father’s will.
  • His will was that Jesus bore our sins in his body on the cross.
  • We can die to sin and live to righteousness.
  • We have an inheritance incorruptible and undefiled.

Under the weight of mistreatment, reviling, insulting, and mocking Jesus endured on the cross, he entrusted himself, accomplished his Father’s will, and provided an incredible blessing for us.

Now, we are dead to sin and alive to righteousness. We are dead to sin and alive to righteousness. Isn’t that amazing? That is a significant blessing.

I realize that under each issue of submission, there might be some jurisdictional questions.

  • Can a husband tell his wife she cannot talk to a pastor because she must shut up and submit?
  • Can a boss or teacher place so many demands that the person can no longer fulfill his/her responsibilities at home?

Sometimes, there are hard questions. However, the basic storyline of this section is follow the example of Jesus by entrusting yourself to him and bless others with your behavior – even those taking advantage of you.

1 Peter 2:12 Keep your behavior excellent among the Gentiles, so that in the thing in which they slander you as evildoers, they may because of your good deeds, as they observe them, glorify God in the day of visitation.

With that in mind, please turn in your Bibles to 1 Peter 3:8. That is on page ______ of the back section of the Bible under the chair in front of you. Please follow along as I read. This is the Word of the Lord.

The title of this message is Blessing Others While Suffering. “To sum up” or some versions say “Finally” means that we are bringing the section that started in 2:11 to a close. Let’s center in on the main point: Give a blessing instead.

2:12 told us to keep our behavior excellent that as they observe our good deeds, they will glorify God. Then here in 3:9 we find giving a blessing instead.

Our world says, “I have to get mine.” “I deserve …” The Bible says, bless others --- even those who hurt you.

That is heavy. In fact, some of you might be thinking already. No way, Rob. I cannot do that. When people hurt me; I want to be done with them. I give them exactly what they deserve. Thankfully, this passage explains how to do it. I would like us to consider 3 truths to embrace to bless those who hurt you.

I. Remember you are called to bless others

1 Peter 2:21 For you have been called for this purpose, since Christ also suffered for you, leaving you an example for you to follow in His steps

1 Peter 3:9 but giving a blessing instead; for you were called for the very purpose that you might inherit a blessing

It is hard to miss the calling language. Believers often use the phrase “God’s will” to describe a similar idea. What is God’s will for my life?

  • We wrestle with questions like what job should we do, who should I marry, how many children should we have, what church should I attend, and on our list goes.

These questions are important, and I do not want to minimize them. But nor do I think we should ignore the passages that clearly explain God’s will.

  • This passage tells me without a doubt that God’s will for my life … one of my callings … is to

Give a Blessing

This does not say “give a blessing” to all the wonderful people in your life. It is easy to bless those who are a blessing. Of course, we are going to do that.

  • This context says to give a blessing rather than returning evil for evil or insult for insult. The term for insult in used in 1 Peter 2:23 for “revile.”

I want to make 2 comments about the terms used.

First, and most importantly. Peter uses the same language to point us back to Christ. You were called to give a blessing amid insult just like Jesus gave a blessing amid insult.

  • I think that is so important because as soon as you take Jesus out of the equation everything breaks down.

The Lord knew that marriages would be torn apart, businesses could not keep talent, and countries cannot stay unified if each person evaluates situations only in the horizontal.

  • Without Jesus I will only scratch your back if you scratch mine.

Second, and secondarily, English versions are not consistent when it comes to the word “abuse.” Abuse is a challenging subject, and I don’t want to get sidetracked into a larger discussion.

  • However, the word for “insult” in our passage is translated as “verbal abuse” in at least one English version. This term is very strong. It is not simply an untimely comment.

Jesus says, I called you to follow me; I set the example and you benefited from that example; and now give a blessing even when insulted or treated poorly.

That raises a very important question. What does it look like to give a blessing?

Verses 10-12 are in a different font. In my Bible they are all capital letters. When I read the text, I did not scream them at you.

  • The all caps tell us that this is a quotation from the OT. It is Psalm 34:12-16.

That means we need to go back to Psalm 34 and find out why Peter quotes it. As soon as we do, we discover that David wrote Psalm 34 while running from Saul. He looks for a safe place and pretends like he is crazy in front of a Philistine governor (1 Sam 21:10-15).

  • That sounds like David is in a desperate situation.
  • The Psalm devotes itself to the subject of God as a provider and a deliverer.

This is the perfect Psalm to quote. The context is just like Peter’s.

  • Peter says instead of returning evil for evil and insult for insult you bless instead because that is what Jesus did when evil people were killing him.
  • In fact, we can even add from Psalm 34 to trust the Lord because he is the provider and deliverer.

Peter quotes David to show this is how God’s people have always been taught to live.

  • When Saul was trying to kill David and David was so desperate that he had pretend like he was crazy, he wrote these words.

1 Peter 3:10-12 For, “The one who desires life, to love and see good days, Must keep his tongue from evil and his lips from speaking deceit. 11 “He must turn away from evil and do good; He must seek peace and pursue it. 12 “For the eyes of the Lord are toward the righteous, And His ears attend to their prayer, But the face of the Lord is against those who do evil.

Psalm 34 is a wonderful Psalm about God as the provider and deliverer. But it was not written during happy days. They were dark and difficult.

  • I think this passage shows us what “blessing others” might look like in normal life.

Jesus blessed by taking our sins in his body on the tree so that we might die to sin and live to righteousness. We cannot do that. We can …

Speak truthfully

Blessing people does not mean passivity. There are many ways to bless a person. One of them is speaking truthfully.

  • I have been reading Jeremiah in my personal morning Bible time. He had a tough job. He had to tell some hard truths to the nation.
  • Sometimes we must bless other people by saying hard things. Things they do not want to hear but need to hear them lest they experience the consequences of their sins.
  • Please listen so you don’t hurt yourself.

What good is a lie? How does being deceitful help? Church family, notice the text … Must keep his tongue from evil and his lips from speaking deceit.

  • It could also be translated more woodenly as “Stop the tongue from evil and the lips of deceitful speaking.” That imagery is powerful. You are about to say something evil or deceitful. It is right at the tip of your tongue.
  • But before it comes out, you stop it. You do not allow it to pass go or collect $200.

Do good

Friends, doing good has many potential options. On the surface it sounds clear. Do good rather than evil.

  • However, if you are struggling with what “good” looks like in a particular case, then please set up a time with your service pastor or whoever you want to talk to.
  • Our email and phone numbers are on the bulletin.

Sometimes we can answer you right away. Other times we will arrange a meeting or a lunch to discuss your situation.

One little test is whether the person you are thinking of would say they are good to you.

Pursue Peace

This is not the same as “refuse to make trouble.” That is a passive response. Pursuing peace is active. In fact, the two commands in the text are seek and pursue peace.

  • I am not sure exactly what pursuing peace would look like in your case especially with a person who causes suffering.
  • However, any of your pastors or deacons would be happy to sit with you and discuss the issue in your specific case.

You might say, “Rob, come on. I mean what you are saying right now is hard. I am suffering at the hands of others. How can I really speak truth, do good, and pursue peace?”

  • Friends, follow Jesus. He died so you might live to righteousness. He set the pace and cleared the path.

You can count on this---if the Lord called you to something, then he will provide what is needed to accomplish his will. Quoting Psalm 34 reminds us that the Lord has been the provider and deliverer for a long time.

We can bless others as we remember our calling, but also as we …

II. Develop the proper character

1 Peter 3:8 all of you be harmonious, sympathetic, brotherly, kindhearted, and humble in spirit

This does not come naturally. Our personality cannot be an excuse. Our character must always go beyond personality. No personality is perfectly like Jesus.

  • Our hope is not in our personality. It comes because we know we are dead to sin and alive to righteousness.
  • Our personality is not an excuse for failing to develop these characteristics.

I encourage you to identify the one that is most difficult for you and seek to take a step of growth in that area this week.

Harmonious

This is not referring to uniformity as if we all must be the same or even think the same. It speaks of getting along with people with whom we disagree. Our agreements are so significant that we remain unified.

At the same time, we can still function with people who differ. Let’s make this super practical. Let’s start in the home.

  • Let’s say that you and another family member (you pick) disagree about how the home should be decorated. It will be decorated. Can someone just get happy?
  • I remember hearing about a major fight that occurred as a couple was filling out the registry for their upcoming wedding. One wanted one set of sheets, and another wanted a different set.
  • Here they are. This is the one time in their life that people are going to hand them a pricing gun and tell them to scan everything they want, and people will buy it.
  • Isn’t that awesome?
  • After we worked through the argument, I suggested that rather than care what color the sheets are, they might choose to care more about who is in them.

Oh my. We can be so difficult, can’t we? We are tempted to:

  • Impose our position on someone else even if it is no big deal
  • Take a person’s disagreement as a frontal attack on our character

Believe that a person is trying to hurt us or make us feel inferior

One more illustration of this. Some would argue that I am annoying today, but there was a day when I was annoying even more annoying. I know that is very difficult to believe.

  • I can still remember where I was on campus when a girl told me that she hoped she never saw me again in her entire life. I totally deserved it.
  • We had a disagreement. I liked her and thought she should like me too. She did not like me and did not believe she should change.
  • What did I do? Live harmonious with her? No! I tried to convince her she was wrong. She did not appreciate it.

Friends, the struggle is real, and I feel it.

Jesus said, I died for your sin that you might live to righteousness. I will teach you how to live peacefully with people who disagree.

Sympathetic

We ought to be sensitive to the others’ joys and difficulties. We ought to be known for the way we celebrate with people experiencing joy and for the way we care for people during their struggles.

At times we struggle celebrating someone else’s success because

  • We wanted their joy (think of a baby)
  • It reminds me of my loss.
  • I want to feel sorry for myself.

At times we struggle caring for others in their hurts because

  • I do not know what to say.
  • I have never been through that.

Church family, we can work on this. We can say … when I experience joy I will try to sensitive to those who would like my joy … when I hear of someone else’s joy I will be sensitive to them by not raining on their party … when I experience hardship I will not demand from those who are happy to feel all my same emotions … when I hear of someone’s hardship I will be sensitive to the hurts they are suffering.

That would significantly decrease the amount of conflict between people. Here is #3…

Brotherly Love

We could say, to “love one another.” When we get lists like this it can be a bit challenging to distinguish the practical differences between the words. What, for example, is the line where sympathetic stops and brotherly love begins?

I think these terms are fluid. I also think that when we are speaking of loving one another we also know that it implies “having the other person’s best interest in mind.”

Even when we correct someone, we do so for their good.

  • We do so because it represents protecting them, caring for them, and providing for them in some way.

We could ask ourselves whether we are guilty of brotherly love as a characteristic of who we are. If someone were to charge you with brotherly love, would there be enough evidence to convict?

Kindhearted or Compassionate

This term emphasizes the emotion. It is often translated compassion. There is an inner feeling associated with the person or event.

  • I do not believe that we must always show our emotion to be emotional. However, the kindhearted or compassionate person does not have an inner feeling only.
  • That person also acts.

Our feelings/emotions of compassion concerning a person or event should elicit some kind of response. Jesus was often moved with compassion. So should we.

We all live in a world of suffering. Sometimes it helps to remember that the person hurting you is also being hurt by someone else.

  • They endure hardships too. It is tempting to hear about them and think, “good, at least they are getting their due.” Or “maybe that will teach them what it feels like on this side.”
  • We must fight the urge to think like that. Being compassionate allows us to hurt for them too.

The Christian community should be known for compassion and that means everyone must have it in their DNA. It is not just for the people we like best. Compassion flows to people who hurt us too.

The final one in the list is …

Humble in Spirit

There are only two paths in life – humility and humiliation. Yet, humility can be difficult to maintain.

I recommend Stuart Scott’s little book, From Pride to Humility. I picked a couple of characters. Please think of their value to you. The humble person…

  • Has no right to question or judge God
  • Is overwhelmed with God’s undeserved grace
  • Sees himself as no better than others
  • Properly understand his gifts and abilities
  • Expresses thanks for criticism or reproof

These need to be growing areas of our character. It is difficult to respond well to a person who is not responding equally well to you. But the Christian call is not to treat people exactly like they treat us, but to bless others – including those who harm us.

We have seen that the only way to accomplish the command to bless others is by remembering your calling to follow the example of Jesus and to, by his grace, develop the proper character by increasing these 5 areas. That brings me to point 3.

III. Rejoice in your eternal home and the Lord’s justice

We can entrust ourselves because the Lord judges righteously. It would be one thing if we are entrusting ourselves to a biased person. That would be truly scary.

  • But following Jesus means that we entrust ourselves to the one who judges righteously. When he judges all of us will marvel at his ability to do it perfectly.

If carrying out justice is his task, then we can embrace ours.

1 Peter 3:9 for you were called for the very purpose that you might inherit a blessing.

You inherit a blessing

We already discussed that Peter quotes Psalm 34 to emphasize the reality that God has been the provider, protector, and redeemer for ages. He did so for David. He will do so for his people. However, we have a challenge to face.

At the beginning of v. 10 it says, 1 Peter 3:10 The one who desires life, to love and see good days. David emphasizes life on earth in Psalm 34. However, what is Peter doing?

Not everyone agrees. Peter’s audience, like David faced severe challenges. There was legitimate persecution.

  • I think “inheriting a blessing” refers to the promised inheritance of eternal life in 1:3-4 [read text if time] reserved in heaven for you.

Biblical writers are consistent in their theme that the glories of heaven are far better than glory of earth. Should we suffer here, it will be more than worth it in the end.

Therefore, we remember that we are released from the power and penalty of sin. We are dead to sin and alive to righteousness.

Is there also a temporal sense? I think the point can be made that following the example of Christ, fulfilling our calling, developing godly character during unjust treatment produces a satisfaction today.

I do not like being hurt, but it is very satisfying to respond to hurt in a way that honors Christ. Giving blessings to others is personally life giving.

The eyes of the Lord pay attention to the righteous and the evil

1 Peter 3:12 “For the eyes of the Lord are toward the righteous, And His ears attend to their prayer, But the face of the Lord is against those who do evil.”

This final point reminds us that the Lord knows it all. His eyes and ears are tuned to the righteous. Verse 12 is so encouraging, especially to men still wrestling through v. 7!

But God’s justice always has two sides.

  • He redeems and vindicates the righteous and he punishes the wicked.

Today is communion Sunday. We did not plan communion around this text, but the two go well together.

If you know that you know that you know you are on your way to heaven because you have a saving relationship with Jesus, then the communion table reminds us that it is possible to do what this text says. He died for our sin that we might be alive to righteousness.

  • At communion, we remember the Lord’s death until he comes. It has a present focus and a future one.
  • When he comes, glory and the promised inheritance is ours.

But friends, it is very possible that I am speaking to someone who does not have a saving relationship with Jesus.

  • Maybe no one has ever told you that the Bible says our sin separates us from God. No one has told you that you must repent of your sin and believe in the death, burial, and resurrection of Jesus.
  • Maybe, you have been listening to this message and thinking, “there is no way I can bless a person who hurts me.” You can’t without the motivation that comes from Christ.

I want to ask you to trust in Christ today.

Romans 10:9-11 says if you confess with your mouth Jesus as Lord, and believe in your heart that God raised Him from the dead, you will be saved; 10 for with the heart a person believes, resulting in righteousness, and with the mouth he confesses, resulting in salvation. 11 For the Scripture says, “Whoever believes in Him will not be disappointed.”

The Bible promises you will not be disappointed. If this is too fast, then please contact one of the pastors and we would be happy to talk with you and answer your questions from the Bible.

Authors

Dr. Rob Green

Roles

Pastor of Faith Church East and Seminary Ministries - Faith Church

MABC Department Chair, Instructor - Faith Bible Seminary

Director of the Biblical Counseling Training Conference - Faith Biblical Counseling Ministries

Bio

B.S. - Engineering Physics, Ohio State University
M.Div. - Baptist Bible Seminary
Ph.D. - New Testament, Baptist Bible Seminary

Dr. Rob Green joined the Faith Church staff in August, 2005. Rob’s responsibilities include oversight of the Faith Biblical Counseling Ministry and teaching New Testament at Faith Bible Seminary. He serves on the Council Board of the Biblical Counseling Coalition and as a fellow for the Association of Certified Biblical Counselors. Pastor Green has authored, co-authored, and contributed to 9 books/booklets. Rob and his wife Stephanie have three children.

Read Rob Green's Journey to Faith for the full account of how the Lord led Pastor Green to Faith Church.